noblerise | IC Inbox

[She appreciates that, however quietly.]

I am fine either way. Though, I understand if you are reluctant to trust me.

[She says that matter-of-factly.]

I was made into a weapon. You cannot be sure of my abilities or how fearsome they are.

[Jusis doesn't even hesitate.]

You're not a weapon. You may have been made into one by those people, but you do not have to be one if that is your choosing.

[In which case, there's really only one option. His choice has already been made, and he's chosen to trust her.]

Let's meet in person. Is there a place you're comfortable meeting?

[The hell is this logic.]

... I... don't know how to be anything else.

[At least she recognizes it.]

The Last Stand has acceptable food.

[She's reminding him of Velvet in a way. Just... Far less angry.]

Then perhaps this is an opportunity to learn. To be the person you want to be.

[Jusis can at least agree with her assessment of The Last Stand.]

Very well. I'll meet you there in about ten or fifteen minutes. If you'd like, I can pay for what you order.

[Who needs emotions when you can just be a void.]

I see... Perhaps you are right.

[At least she's vaguely agreeable?]

I can pay for my order. I'll not burden you further.

[Wait, if they're meeting she should tell him what she looks like.]

Look for a black hat.

[And there she hangs up... disappearing just as quickly as she appeared.

She arrives at the Last Stand dressed about as casual as one can expect from someone learning how to People: a loose black shirt with long sleeves, a bit frilly and old-fashioned; and black leggings with knee-high combat boots. And yes, she's wearing some kind of fancy black hat that may have been filched from a Halloween discount store. Who knows.

More importantly, she has her phone in her hand and the vaguely lost expression of someone looking for the nearest Interview with a Vampire audition.]

[At this point, Jusis just accepts her hanging up on him abruptly.

He arrives on time at The Last Stand, and boy does Zero stick out like a sore thumb in Kaisou. In cities like New York, her state of dress wouldn't even get a second glance. Jusis approaches her and gives Zero a nod in greeting.]

Zero, I presume? It's nice to meet you face-to-face. Would you prefer staying out here or taking this inside?

[Kaisou is colorful, though, and Zero is like... where color goes to die. She sucks it out of the environment. It's a scientific fact.

She lifts her pale eyes from her phone when she's addressed. She isn't sure how she expected Jusis to look, but he's very put together, unlike her... everything. She nods back, and sticks her phone in her pocket.]

Jusis. [She's almost too calm, but there are little signs that she feels deeply out of her element, like where her eyes go, and her hesitation before speaking.]

Let us move inside, then. It's still winter.

[Zero is sort of... indifferent to it, honestly, but Jusis is a normal person and normal people dislike the cold.]

[Jusis nods and heads inside with her. He brings her over to a table where it's out of the way. It should be less likely for them to be overheard here. The blond takes a seat across from Zero. A waitress comes by to take their order soon after they're seated, and Jusis asks for water and some kind of chicken covered in a white wine sauce and sauteed mushrooms.

Overall, he's patient and doesn't ask her questions. He won't pressure her into talking so quickly.]

[Zero considers, then she orders water too. As for the entree? Fucking archon loaf. a.k.a. the worst thing on the menu. It's basically fish bread. Who the fuck invented this? She looks completely unfazed by this though...

... Maybe she's ordered it before?

She sits almost perfectly still while they wait for their food, watching Jusis with her arms crossed as if she can gauge what kind of man he is just from looks alone. In truth, though, she's just awkward and doesn't know where to start. There's just... so much... Luckily food doesn't take long, but Zero doesn't touch it immediately anyway.]

... I was born in the lab, [she says after a while.] I don't know exactly where it is located. Rural England, perhaps. The nearest village is hours away by foot, and the people living there think that it's a chemical warehouse.

[She sounds so... detached, but this is how she's survived this long.]

Krusnik's research at that facility revolves around combining humans with supernaturals, or monsters—whatever you want to call them. My mother was one of their test subjects. She didn't change in any way, but the child she was carrying had been touched by the experiments. As a result I was born with a natural aptitude for shadow magic. They thought they had made a half-Shade, and raised me with this expectation...

[She takes a sip of water.]

For years upon years, they brought me to the brink of death with their trials, but they never let me die. I grew stronger in my art, but I never seemed to satisfy their questions. [She adjusts her hat.] I didn't see anyone else in that prison, save for my minders and the beasts they pitted me against. But I'd hear them, for a while. And then I stopped hearing them altogether.

[They died, obviously.]

When I had finally outlived my usefulness to them, they tried to dispose of me. My captors underestimated my strength. I killed them and I fled.

That was... five or six years ago, perhaps. I have been running ever since.

[Jusis doesn't touch his food immediately, either. What she's going to say is most likely stomach-turning, so he'd rather not eat until they're done. She seems to be taking his measure, but maybe she's also just as awkward as he is. Or more so, depending on how one looks at it.

He listens to her story when she starts. Her detachment as she speaks is... familiar. Achingly so. Jusis has had to interview victims before, he's heard the detachment as a way to protect themselves from their trauma. So that they don't break down in front of so many strangers. It never gets easier to hear.

Hearing all of that, he just... hurts for her. As he did for Ash. As he did for Jun.]

You've suffered greatly. I wish I had more to say, other than that I'm sorry it happened to you.

[She's never really broken down before. Hard to tell if she even knows how.]

I survived, [Zero says simply.] I suffered countless atrocities at their hands, yet I do not dwell on it. There is no point. I cannot undo the pain with revenge, nor can I reclaim my missing years. Even my name has been lost to me... I am wholly someone else.

Still, I should explain.

[She looks down at the waiting piece of archon loaf.]

When I contacted you, I was unsure of your intentions. I thought perhaps you had followed me thus far and intended to drag me back into captivity after all these years. It is obvious now that I was gravely mistaken, but I'll not deny that my actions were reckless, and came from a place of... fear, perhaps.

[She says it like she isn't sure, because she... isn't. She thought she discarded fear like everything else.]

Now that all has been revealed, and I am not being pursued like I thought... I have to decide what freedom means for myself. [a beat] Living among people is more difficult than I anticipated.

[With that stellar observation out of the way, she picks her food off her plate like one would a piece of toast, and takes a bite of the cursed soylent bread. She might not be human. Though she's also already hinted at that, to be fair.]

[Jusis listens as she lays it out to him. Her reasons, her thoughts. Her lack of expressing emotion. A fire has gone out of Zero, and, in a disquieting way, he's reminded even more strongly of Velvet. Will she be like this when her revenge is complete?

No, he can't think about that right now. Jusis can worry about her when he's not giving his full attention to Zero. The blond follows her lead, taking a bite of his own food, but it tastes like ash in his mouth. 'Just go through the motions, Albarea. Like you always do with unpleasant discussions.]

Difficult, yes, but from my observations those with the Libra app are more than willing to lend a helping hand. Even my team would be willing.

[They're good people, after all. Each and every one of them is a fundamentally good person, even Velvet despite her protests of being a monster. Even if Jusis is questioning whether or not he's still a good person, and not a disappointment to the people around him.]

You're always free to call me if you ever need assistance, or if you simply want someone to listen to you or talk with you. You need not go through this alone, Zero.

[Poor Jusis, she has no idea what she's putting him through. For her, eating is just something she has to do. It isn't something she usually enjoys doing; that was a luxury long denied to her.]

It does seem that way.

[She's spoken to Fugo and Ash, and Lillian (though she doesn't know her affiliation). Them, Jun, and the ones who helped her when she first got the app... All very helpful, curious people. At least one she calls friend.

She drinks some of her water, finding her throat strangely dry after that meal. It's a good opportunity to reflect on... whatever Jusis is offering. Someone to listen? To talk to? She has never needed anything like that before, and she has no idea how to start.]

I still don't understand why you offer me your time and your kindness. [And yet she doesn't think it's entirely out of guilt. Fugo said that he just likes to help people. Maybe that's it?] You owe me nothing. I am the one indebted to you for the trouble I caused.

[She closes her eyes for a moment. More to herself than to Jusis, she murmurs:]

I escaped years ago. How is it that I am still "going through something", when the danger is gone?

[THAT'S TRAUMA, BABY]

[The blond shakes his head. All this talk of debt, of something being owed....]

My time and my kindness aren't transactional. They don't require repayment. I give this to you freely and because it is my choice. Just as it is your choice whether you want to accept them or not.

[Jusis clasps his hands together and rests them on top of the table.]

I, personally, do not feel as if you owe me anything. It was an honest mistake. One you've apologized for, and one for which I give my forgiveness.

[Her expression actually registers some degree of surprise when he says it so... openly, and without guile. She's still very much processing all of this. Her pale eyes shift from him to the table, and back to him. What is she supposed to say to that? This society functions on transactions. At least, that's the way she... was taught...

Every time she thinks she learns something, she only has more questions.]

... I see no reason to reject them, [she says finally.] I know I am in need of help—perhaps more help than one person can give. [Jun, Scintilla, Rose, and the others—they've offered help as well. It's not as if he'd be overburdened.]

After learning what I have, and seeing this city... I cannot consider returning to that dark place. There is—something new within me. A spark, perhaps.

[She rests her hand over her heart beating steadily. Alive.]

I want to discover what freedom means for myself. I want to nurture this tiny fire inside me and learn what it means. Mayhap in pursuit of that answer, I will come to understand what drives you and yours, as well.

[The blond man seems to soften somewhat. Hearing her say that, that she's feeling some sort of spark within her, reminds him abruptly of Altina. Her burgeoning feelings for everyone, and her confession of seeing Millium as her sister.]

I believe you can and you will. The drive you have to learn, no matter how painful, will serve you well in discovering what freedom means to you. Should you find yourself faltering, don't forget that we're here to help you stand again. Keep moving forward, relentlessly.

[Crow, his final breath spent saying those final words to them, rings loudly in his head as he says them himself. Jusis keeps a tight hold on his emotions, burying them as he sips his tea and eats his food. He's remembered that death before, but... it's not until now that he remembers Crow's last words.]

[There's some weight to those last few words that even Zero isn't oblivious to. She thinks for a moment, then nods.]

You have my word.

[The waiter comes back around with two separate checks. Zero pays her half with cash.]

... If you have use for one born in shadow and cannot stray from the light yourself, call for me. [One eye peeks at him from beneath her hat.] In my... distant past, in that old world, my calling was that of the reaper. I do not find it ill-fitting.

[Jusis pays his with cash as well, covering the tip for both of them. He looks at her, meeting her eyes, and nods once.]

I shall keep that in mind. Should you find yourself in trouble, I'll aid you however I can. [His smile is thin and humorless.] Words are not the only weapons I use.

[She looks at him curiously. If she had to guess...]

... A sword and shield?

[She remembers, vaguely, wielding them herself for a time. It was a different life.]

You seem like a man who has much to protect.

[Jusis tilts his head slightly. That's an interesting assessment. She certainly isn't far off, though he remembers briefly a woman wielding those weapons in his past.]

...I cannot deny that. You're right, I do have people I wish to protect.

[Not even just the people on his team, but Elliot is one of the first who comes to mind. They can take care of themselves, yet that doesn't take away the fact that Jusis will leap to their defense when called. He'll defend them with his life, like he was prepared to do for Rean.]

I use a combination of magic and a saber to fight. I have a court fencing style that I've been honing.

Might and magic... It sounds like something out of a fairy tale. [Yet the way she says it isn't derogatory, but almost... fond? Some of the scant memories she retains are of daring heroes and flashy fighters in her mother's stories. And part of her had always hoped that heroes like that still existed, even though she had no proof until now.

She lacks imagination, but even she can see how Jusis might resemble those tales of old.]

Perhaps I'll see it myself some day.

[She gets up and pushes in her chair.]

If there is nothing else... [She tucks her hat in a gesture like a bow.]

[Jusis stands as well, and he gives her a nod. A fairytale, huh....]

There is not. I hope the rest of your day is a pleasant one, Zero.

[He'll walk with her out of the Last Stand. His heart is a heavy burden, but he needs to be able to walk forward on his own two feet. He doesn't want to take advantage of the kindness his loved ones have given him.

After all, what is he if not a hypocrite?]

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